Monday, December 31, 2012

I LIKE THE "C" WORDS

Not THAT "C" word. Get your head in the game or more appropriately, get out of MY head where these words and phrases may sometimes reside.

As we bid a fond farewell to 2012, some have said this year can't end quickly enough.  On many levels, I concur.  On others, not so much.

2012 may have been THE single most life altering year I've ever experienced.  I am forever changed and it's all happened over these past twelve months.  What started as a joke, my silly little blog, has taken me places I could never have imagined.  My life is enriched in ways I can't possibly describe because of relationships that I cherish and I treasure.  To think many of these friendships were non-existent at the end of 2011 truly boggles my mind.

I find myself looking back.  What were my hopes?  Did I have goals?  Did I even SET goals?  I'm too damn old for goals.......Many conversations starting today and going into next week will include that question:  "So, did you make any New Year's resolutions?"  And I find myself with my typical reply, "I don't do resolutions."  I won't finish the thought aloud, but in my head, I'm saying, "I see them as a set up for failure."

I will do this.

I am going to do that.

I won't do the other thing.

All of that is just too damn restrictive and life shouldn't come with those kinds of restrictions.

For me, it's not about resolutions but rather, it's about finding ways I want to live.  Last year, I followed the lead of Phillipa, The Feisty Blue Gecko in Yangon.  In a beautifully written post: Three Words To Guide And Inspire Us, she shares how she starts each year.

For 2011, I wanted to be Calm, Centered AND Rebellious.  I like the "C" words and apparently, I also like having to do battle within my own head.  How can one person be both calm and rebellious?  To rebel is to resist authority.  I think the only way to buck the trend, to be successfully rebellious, a calm approach is essential.  We can be passionate, we can wear our emotions on our sleeves, we can humanize what we are trying to change, and, we can still do that calmly.

It wasn't really a battle in my own head.  It was simply speaking in ways that others might hear.  The very brilliant Lisa Bonchek Adams captured the essence of respectful and effective communication.  This is the way things might begin to change:

"Try to express difference of opinion with diplomacy and disagree with respect."

We have much work to do.  Many have died.  It seems these past six weeks have been one episode of bad news followed by another.  Barb's mets diagnosis, Lisa's mets diagnosis, so many more of the mets patients struggling through debilitating side effects or treatments that are no longer working, it's coming in waves.  We need a revolutionary break through and we need it NOW.

I am not going to replace my 2011 words.  I am going to build upon them.  I must stay rebellious and push for the right research.  This year, I am going to work toward encouraging better connections among all the players.  If everyone is seated at the same table from the very beginning, we will have an opportunity for truly collaborative and cohesive efforts.

Calmly connecting the players to stay centered and focused will create an environment of collaboration and cohesiveness and THAT is the way toward meaningful change.

That is what we call a successful rebellion and THAT is why I like the "C" Words.

And now, my three words have grown to six, or perhaps I've been rebellious and now there are seven.......

2012, I bid you adieu......

Bienvenue 2013!

7 comments:

  1. Happy New Year, AnneMarie!!! Rebellion looks good on you, as does the connection since you seem to be incredibly adept at making such meaningful connections.

    Have a lovely celebration, and I'll read you in 2013! ~Catherine

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  2. It has been quite a year AnneMarie and I am so grateful that though reading your blog, I have learned and grown so much as well as been exposed to so many other blogs. It is amazing to look back on the year and realize how much had happened, and you have experienced some extreme highs and lows. Together we look to 2013 and as you say there is much work to be done. I know there is plenty to look forward to in the coming year while at the same time now that we know about 30% of us who have had early stage breast cancer will end up with metastatic breast cancer we also know there will be some huge disappointments. Meanwhile, I wish you a very Happy New Year! I am really hoping we will meet in person this New Year. Then I can give you a heartfelt hug. For now (virtual) hugs to you - Susan

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  3. AnneMarie:
    You have wonderful "C" goals for the new year, but please continue to be rebellious. That spark is what initially drew me to your blog. It's ok to be a little self-centered too - not at the expense of everyone else, but you have to do what YOU feel is right for YOU.
    Wishing you much happiness and good health in 2013!!!
    Ellen xoxo

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  4. I love your rebellious self! Don't change a thing in 2013. May the New Year be full of all your favorite things! xo

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  5. I want a revolution too and I want it now! Let's make it happen. A big, warm hug, rebellious amazon

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  6. Connecting to like-minded people in the blogsopshere has been a real treat for me this year.
    Your blog helps build cohesion among us AnneMarie and I look forward to continuing to collaborate. There's a time for calm and there's a time for rebellion. And then there's time for a calm rebellion that will help bring change in the BC arena. We are on our way and you are helping make that happen. Thanks and Happy New Year!

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  7. LOVE this! Thanks for the motivation to do more!

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