Thursday, October 24, 2013


Many of us saw the campaign about "motorboarding" for charity.  This, the act of a man placing his face between the breasts of a random woman and get a cheap thrill by.... never mind.. google it for a full explanation, was to raise awareness?  Make money to donate to charity?  Or, once again, to turn a disease into a party.  A joke.  Or what?

I saw that the recipient of the funds, Breast Cancer Research Foundation, returned the donation with an email to the group responsible for these antics.  Touche to BCRF for taking a step toward letting people know what is okay and what isn't.

Because I made myself a promise as October approached that I would not be divisive, that I would attempt to use any opportunity as a chance to listen and to be heard, and because I was up too late (which is going to buy me time in jail via the #BedPolice, aka Dr. Deanna Attai), I saw this cross my newsfeed.  And, I left a comment.

I've since deleted the comment, foolishly without saving it.  I'll try to recall the wording:

Can we open up a dialogue?  I am a breast cancer patient and my mom is a two time breast cancer patient whose disease has now spread to a bone.  Haters? No.  We are just people living with a disease that has left us scarred, with no sensation.  Things like this are hurtful and serve as reminders..... 

I forgot how I ended the thing... I know that was the crux of the message.  I know I included something about sexualizing a disease that is anything but sexy but since I can't recall the exact wording I used, I'm going to refrain from elaborating.  It was late, I have chemobrain.  I just know that the wording was carefully chosen to truly and hopefully open up a dialogue. Because this is how things change.  One person at the time, one thing at the time.

I saw a few comments last night in response to my remarks, mostly positive and then realized, "What the hell are you doing?"  This can very quickly turn into a commotion and I do not want to be in the middle of THAT commotion.  Thus, the comment was deleted.

Apparently, however, comments were directed at me.  They were emailed to me.  I suppose my You Tube settings need to be adjusted.  Some of what was in my email is below.  My offer to open a dialogue with Jason, Jesse and Kong still stands. I will be more than happy to hear them out if they will afford me the same opportunity.

Guys, if you happen to see this, we aren't haters.  We are simply trying to stop making breast cancer into the punch line of a joke.  It's a disease, it's horrible and can you think of any other disease where such antics are acceptable methods of fund raising or "supporting the cause."  Why is this okay?  I'd like to understand the thought process but only if those who continue to perpetrate this nonsense are willing to listen to the other side.

Here are some of the comments... in the order in which they were received, minus the names of the parties who left them:

I am sorry that things like this open old wounds. I think they meant well... this was just entirely ill-contrived. I lost my aunt to breast cancer when she was in her early 30's, and I remember the difficulty that she went through at the loss of her breasts. Unfortunately, it had already metastasized. Rather than "saving the tata's" can we just focus on saving the women?

I'm sure that you have a point, But I might believe that this point can be a little selfish, since the main propose is not to make you feel bad, but to make less people suffer from such a big and painful process. Because I'm sure that if your case was at the very beginning you would pray for this money to come to you and as fast as possible so it could end soon,
even though you weren't as fortunate as the people I hope get the money on time. But you could be happy that there are people trying to help, because I'm sure you don't wish to others the same that happened to you.

    Note:  This is all from the same person.....
Finally someone with a valid point. Thanks for saving us from the "us-vs-the-men" feminists here that seem to hate all male existence on earth, animals included. 
I do agree with you to some extent. Motor-boating, in particular, isn't a very sympathetic act towards those suffering from breast cancer. A better video would have been one that instructs the viewers of what the cancer is, how to detect it early, and why Simple Pickup chose to donate their money.

I invite you to take their act in context of their channel. Simple Pickup is supposed to be a channel, that, at its core values, supposed to motivate men to be confident and more attractive towards women. This is a relationship/self-help channel. These guys are not medical professional, and my guess is they don't have a tiniest clue what breast cancer is, other than knowing it's just some kind of diseases of female breast.

My take from the video and the message it's supposed to convey 

- it's possible to "motor-boat" random girls whom you don't personally know if you are confident

- some girls seems to enjoy the act, too. The girls who were "motor-boated" were smiling and appeared to have a great time.

- we, as men, should appreciate the breasts of women. We should show this appreciation by contributing to a charity that helps fight a disease concerning this organ.

I'm not saying I 100% agree with all of what this video preaches, but it's made with a good intention. 
My opinion is that Simple Pickup doesn't intend to harm women, harass them, rape them, or make the ones with breast disease feel hurt. But their videos can easily be misunderstood.

That is the end of that one commenter.

To:AnneMarie Ciccarella

Thank you for your reaction on the 2nd Simple Pick-up channel.
I hope you woke them up because the video is gone on their main channel. Via history it says private.
Dear AnneMarie, I wish you all the best in life.
With respect, and greetings from Amsterdam-NL

Sorry to hear about your past. But if someone made a donation to a charrity, wich money came from selling dope and help destroy someones life. Then im on the motorboating side anytime of the day. Its not ment to remind you of what you have lost. Its their way to make money, and that they donate a part of that money, is just respectful. My mother had breastcancer. She saw this video and she said she was proud of these young fellas. And btw she laughed her ass off!

your an idiot

Obviously, as a male I cannot even begin to comprehend what it must feel like physiologically and mentally to have breast cancer. I agree that the word 'haters' is ridiculous, as it refers to a bunch of people that probably have personal involvement with breast cancer. And yes, their feelings matter. However, to get random strangers to donate money these days, you need to cut through the clutter and appeal to them, especially if they have no personal involvement. I think they did very well.


It was simple a way to have fun and entertain a large mass of people while donating to a foundation that help better the research on preventing this cancer. It was in no way a video intended to offend you or others. This video is allowing them to chip in, in hopes to help eliminate breast cancer completely. The viewers that support this video support it not to be hurtful but to support and encourage their drive to donate.

Yeah, using the pretense of "giving to charity" to get chicks to allow you to feel them up is pretty low.

I completely agree with you and respect your opinion but if someone loses a leg or becomes paralysed or something terrible like that and just say cant walk ever again you you want them to never see someone run again because they cant? and someone who has been through the pain should not hate and know what the money can do and if you have something like boobs or legs use them when you have the chance because maybe they will get breast cancer and cant do it in the future

I have nothing to say about the comments.  I'm just sharing to provide some insight into the way people think.  Although, I do particularly love those who respond to reasonable statements but resorting to immediate name calling or YELLING!!!!

Please note, these are only the comments that were written directly to me in response to my comment.  Gotta work on that impulsivity stuff.  Or perhaps, I need to heed the good doctor and get to bed at the appointed time.  Come to think of it, I'm reminded of the advice of a friend's mother from many years ago, "Nothing good EVER HAPPENS on a street corner. And NOTHING good every happens after midnight."  I guess this is what she meant by the second half of that statement.

The story about the return of the donation can be found here.

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  1. I just dislike the waste and the hypocrisy. And the irrelevance. What does a Pink garbage can have to do with anything? Or here's a new one "Hay Bales of Hope." I saw some by the side of the road up here this month. What the heck does sheathing harvested Hay in pink plastic have to do with anything? Is it to remind the cows to get their udders checked? Maybe the campaign has finally found someone or thing that isn't aware theat Breast Cancer is not a 'good thing.'

    I was ruminating on this, and then realized I had bought 'Pinked' birdseed at the store. Ah yes, now we can spread the Hope for the Cure to chickadees.
    AL from the upper Midwest

    1. It's completely out of control. There are plenty of organizations doing the right thing but there are far more who are jumping on a pink bandwagon. It has made this less of a disease and more of a party. And that is wrong.

    2. But think of all the Cows and Chickadees we can save!!! Hmm. Maybe I should 'pink' my houseplants... I'm right there with you, but occassionally a wry acknowledgement of the ridiculous can bring a snort, if not a laugh.
      AL in the upper Midwest

  2. What is appalling is not just that these boys (yes, boys) did this but that the women agreed and went along with it! I fear for our future generation.


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